There is nothing wrong with teenagers that reasoning with them won't aggravate.

John Wilmot

Before I was married I had six theories about raising children. Now I have six children and no theories.

Have you ever dated someone because you were too lazy to commit suicide?

I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky, but there's never any gum under any of them.

Erica Jong

Men and women, women and men -- it will never work.

You need someone to love while you're looking for someone to love.


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