Never give a party if you will be the most interesting person there.

To reduce stress, avoid excitement. Spend more time with your spouse.

People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately.

Calvin Trillin

Marriage is not merely sharing the fettucini, but sharing the burden of finding the fettucini restaurant in the first place.

Statistics show that of those who contract the habit of eating, very few survive.


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