The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her, or she'll take it anyway.

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and wide open afterwards.

David Pryce-Jones

When you're bored with yourself, marry, and be bored with someone else.

Farmer's Almanac Magazine

A man does not have to be a bigamist to have one wife too many.

Kids are like husbands. They're fine as long as they're someone else's.

Juanita Kreps

I'd like to get to the point where I can be just as mediocre as a man.

Venus, a beautiful good-natured lady, was the goddess of love; Juno, a terrible shrew, was the goddess of marriage -- and they were always mortal enemies.

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